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‘PRESIDENT TRUMP?’ GET USED TO IT, BABY, AS THE DONALD SOARS

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THURSDAY, JAN. 28, 2016) — THE PLANET “gets” the candidacy of Donald Trump? Let us explain why The Donald has taken this presidential campaign season by storm — and we mean storm. TRUMP #1 — “That Individual” As Steven Colbert revealed during his recent interview with Trump, GOP bosses [...]

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FOUR ON THE FLOOR, a.k.a., QUIK HITZ & HOT LIX

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY, JAN. 27, 2016) — Time to clean up the odds and ends in the writer’s notebook. THE PLANET brings you Four on the Floor, a.k.a., Quik Hitz and Hot Lix. IF THIS BE ‘PROGRESS,’ … — Remember the old GE slogan? “Progress is [...]

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‘SWAN LAKE’ AT UMASS MORE LIKE ‘SWAN FAKE’ … or … PC RUN AMOK: THE DEATH OF MEN

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, TUESDAY, JAN. 26, 2016) — Now playing on a college campus near you, the hit musical “The Death of Men.” This laugh riot of happy hits and snappy patter explores the fun and games of political correctness with respect to gender and sexuality, the laff [...]

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BATTLE OF THE BOARDS: LEAKED MEMOS SHINE LIGHT ON MESS AT AND OVER COMMUNITY ReSTART

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY, JAN. 25, 2016) — Through our sources, THE PLANET has obtained recent internal memos regarding The Battles of the Boards. At stake: Control of Community ReStart, a “good will” agency that has lost sight of its mission to help those in need in favor [...]

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PUKELEA: A NEWS ITEM FROM AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE … THE COMMENT LINE IS OPEN

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEEKEND EDITION, JAN. 22-24, 2016) — Yesterday, we beat all local media in breaking the news of Mayor Linda Tyer‘s latest appointments — Matt Kerwood as finance director, Denis Guyer as buildings and maintenance main man, and Michael Taylor as personnel chief. Today, we [...]

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FRANK SULLIVAN PASSES AWAY … SOX PITCHER, ROCKWELL MODEL: ‘HE DIDN’T BUY US A BEER, THOUGH’

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THURSDAY, JAN. 22, 2016) —  On Dec. 15, 1960, pitcher Frank Sullivan was involved the Biggest Trade in Baseball History when the Boston Red Sox sent him to the Philadelphia Phillies for Gene Conley. Why was it the biggest? Sullivan stood 6’7” tall, with [...]

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