By DAN VALENTI

PLANET VALENTI News and Commentary

(FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEEKEND EDITION, JAN. 23.25, 2015) — Well, THE PLANET, too, has been captured by the gravitational pull of a huge, international story that has captivated the limited global attention spans. For the a story to go this big, this quick, the very existence of the planet (heavens to thank, no THE PLANET) must hinge on the outcome. We speak not of the international terrorist threat nor of the worldwide conspiracy to impurify our “precious bodily fluids.” Not of nuclear Armageddon or the looming next Great Depression. This story is much more significant than all that.

We’re talking PSI: New England, otherwise known as Deflategate.

New England Patriots fans should thank the rest of the civilized world for obsessing about psi and the other hot air of the football deflation “crisis” for giving the team a cause. See, the team, the winningest in NFL history by so many barometrics, now has an assassin’s cold-blooded mindset to go along with their natural desire to win. The team knows that the only way to shut everyone up about the manufactured “controversy” of football psi is to win the Super Bowl.

Which they will. Guaranteed. Thus, after all the nonsense is over, The B-Men will once again stand astride as conquerers of the world, Alexanders of the Air Supply, the Colossus standing astride the portal of greatness.

When the Patriots beat the Seattle Seahawks on Super Bowl Sunday, all of their haters have to shut their traps. The NFL loves parity. It hates dominance of the kind practiced in New England since 2001, an unprecedented skein of success that the league thought it has artificially engineered out of existence. They didn’t count of Bob Kraft, Bill Belichick, or Tom Brady, the greatest owner-coach-QB combo of all time.

That’s the ultimate response to the current attempt to sully the team’s historic greatness: Win the Super Bowl and drive the football, at whatever psi it might be, into the mealy mouths of so many jealous detractors.

The media, of course, loves this story for giving them plenty of nothing to write about during the interminable two-week layoff between the conference championships and the Super Bowl. They drive the story on Yahoo!, Google, Twitter, and in the voracious, copy- and content-gobbling of cyberspace and the 24/7 news cycle of cable news.

THE PLANET quotes Patriots’ Pro Bowler Matthew Slater: “We have to focus on preparing for the football game and playing the Seattle Seahawks,” Slater concluded. “That’s where our focus is. Obviously, there are a number of other things going on. This is a game we’ve worked for our whole careers. It’s not hard to focus on that. This is not a vacation for us, this is not a celebration. We have a job to do.”

But enough of our words. THE PLANET presents the transcripts of the press conferences help by Belichick and Brady on the issue. Read them. Judge for yourselves. We find the responses credible, honest, up front, and a fitting representation of this proud franchise.

—————– 00000 ——————

In Bill We Trust: Coach B Speaks

Let me just say that my personal coaching philosophy, my mentality has always been to make things as difficult as possible for players in practice. So with regard to footballs, I’m sure that any current or past player of mine would tell you that the balls we practice with are as bad as they can be: wet, sticky, cold, slippery. However bad we can make them, I make them. Any time that players complain about the quality of the footballs, I make them worse and that stops the complaining. We never use the condition of the footballs as an excuse. We play with whatever or kick with whatever we have to use and that’s the way it is. That has never been a priority for me and I want the players to deal with a harder situation in practice than they’ll ever have to deal with in the game. Maybe that’s part of our ball security philosophy.

I’m trying to coach the team and that’s what I want to do. I think we all know that quarterbacks, kickers, specialists have certain preferences on footballs. They know a lot more about it than I do. They’re a lot more sensitive to it than I am. I hear them comment on it from time to time, but I can tell you and they will tell you that there is never any sympathy whatsoever from me on that subject. Zero. Tom’s [Brady] personal preferences on his footballs are something he can take about in much better detail and information than I could possibly provide. I could tell you that in my entire coaching career I have never talked to any player, staff member about football air pressure. That is not a subject that I have ever brought up. To me the footballs are approved by the league and game officials pregame and we play with what’s out there. That’s the only way that I have ever thought about that.

I’ve learned about the inflation range situation. Obviously with our footballs being inflated to the 12.5-pound range, any deflation would then take us under that specification limit. Knowing that now, in the future we will certainly inflate the footballs above that low level to account for any possible change during the game. As an example, if a ball deflated from 13.2 to 12.9 it wouldn’t matter. But if it deflated from 12.5 to 12.3 it would – as an example. We will take steps in the future to make sure that we don’t put ourselves in that type of potential situation again.

The National Football League is investigating this situation. We have cooperated fully, quickly and completely with every request that they have made; [we] continue to be cooperative in any way that we can. I have no explanation for what happened. That’s what they’re looking into. So I can’t comment on what they’re doing. That’s something that you should talk to them about.

Again, my overall knowledge of football specifications, the overall process that happens on game day with the footballs is very limited. I would say that during the course of the game, I honestly never – it probably has happened on an incomplete pass or something – but I’ve never touched a game ball. It’s not something I have any familiarity with on that.

Again, I was completely and totally unaware of any of this that we’re talking about in the last couple days until Monday morning. Based on what I knew Sunday, Sunday night, thinking back on this, which I’ve done several times, [I] really can’t think of anything that I would have done differently, based on what I knew then, based on what I know now. I told you the one change we would make in the initial start level of the football pressure, but that’s really about it.

It’s unfortunate that this is a story coming off of two great playoff victories by our football team and our players. But again, we’ve been cooperative with the NFL investigation. We’ll continue to do so and we will turn all our attention and focus on to the Seattle Seahawks, a very well coached, talented, tough, competitive football team.

We’ve spent the last four days, three days, with our preparations and so forth for the trip. I think those are coming to a conclusion. We’re wrapping that up and we’re starting our preparations today with the Seahawks and practicing through the weekend. We’ll have a good, solid opportunity to get ourselves ready to go before we head down there.

Again, I have no further comment on the NFL investigation and I’ve told you all I know about the subject from my perspective. That’s where we are.

——————— 0000000 ———————-

Brady Stands Tall in the Pocket

TOM BRADY: Obviously I’d much rather be up here talking about the Seahawks and preparing for the Super Bowl, which we’ve been trying to do for the last few days. I know Coach [Bill] Belichick addressed it with you guys this morning and I wanted to give you guys the opportunity to ask [the] questions that you want. I’ll do my best to provide the answers that I have, if any, and we’ll go from there.

Q: When and how did you supposedly alter the balls?

TB: I didn’t have any – I didn’t alter the ball in any way. I have a process that I go through before every game where I go in and I pick the footballs that I want to use for the game. Our equipment guys do a great job of breaking the balls in. they have a process that they go through. When I pick those balls out, at that point to me they’re perfect. I don’t want anyone touching the balls after that. I don’t want anyone rubbing them, putting any air in them, taking any air out. To me those balls are perfect and that’s what I expect when I show up on the field. That happened obviously on Sunday night. It was the same process that I always go through. I didn’t think anything of it. Obviously I woke up Monday morning and answered a question on the radio about it and that was the first I really hard about it.

Q: This has raised a lot of uncomfortable conversations for people around this country who view you as their idol. The question they’re asking themselves is, ‘What’s up with our hero?’ Can you answer right now, is Tom Brady a cheater?

TB: I don’t believe so. I feel like I’ve always played within the rules. I would never do anything to break the rules. I believe in fair play and I respect the league and everything they’re doing to try to create a very competitive playing field for all the NFL teams. It’s a very competitive league. Every team is trying to do the best they can to win every week. I believe in fair play and I’ll always believe in that for as long as I’m playing.

Q: Some people think Coach Belichick threw you under the bus this morning, do you feel that way?

TB: No, I think everyone is obviously trying to figure out what happened. I think that’s the main thing over the last couple days. It’s trying to figure out what happened. Like I said, I was as surprised as anybody when I heard Monday morning what was happening. I think over the last few days people have been trying to figure out – as the NFL is trying to figure out – what part of the process and from when I saw the ball which was five hours before halftime, what exactly happened.

Q: Do all quarterbacks doctor the balls and have you done anything differently from anyone else in the league?

TB: I’m not sure. I can only speak for myself. I think that there’s a process that everybody goes through breaking in footballs. It’s probably a lot like a baseball mitt when you’re a kid. I try to explain that to my friends a lot. When you use it and that’s your equipment, the football is something that I handle on every play. I want to be very familiar with the equipment that I’m using, just like my cleats, just like my helmet, just like my pads. You go through that process of breaking the balls in and getting comfortable with them. Of course I choose the balls that I want to use for the game and that’s what I expect to go out on the playing field with.

Q: How important is it for you to get this out of the way and take this head-on so you can get focused on the Super Bowl?

TB: That’s where the importance is, as far as I’m concerned. I know this is a very important thing and that’s why I’m here addressing it. I know my teammates, we accomplished something really special getting to this point. I don’t like the fact that this is taking away from some of the accomplishment of what we’ve achieved as a team. I think hopefully our best is still to come. We’re going to work as hard as we can over the next 10 days to put ourselves in a great position to be prepared for the game.

Q: Do you know the difference between an under-inflated ball and an over-inflated ball? Did you notice a difference in the balls used in the first half and second half?

TB: From the first half to the second half, I didn’t think twice about it. I didn’t put one thought into the football at that point. Once I approve the ball, like I said, that’s the ball that I expect out there on the field. It wasn’t even a thought, inkling of a concern of mine that they were any different. I just assumed that they were exactly the same: first half, second half.

Q: What do you say to the skeptics that say, ‘The Patriots have had violations before. How can we possibly believe what Brady and the coach are saying now?’

TB: Everybody has an opinion. I think everybody has the right to believe whatever they want. I don’t ever cast judgment on someone’s belief system. If that’s what they feel like they want to do, then I don’t have a problem with that. I think part of being in this position and putting yourself under a spotlight like this and being open for criticism, I think that’s very much a part of being a professional athlete. We can only express to you what our side is and how we approach it. Then everyone is going to make their own [conclusion].

Q: Are you comfortable that nobody on the Patriots side did anything wrong?

TB: I have no knowledge of anything. I have no knowledge of any wrongdoing –

Q: Are you comfortable that nobody did anything?

TB: Yeah, I’m very comfortable saying that. I’m very comfortable saying that nobody did it, as far as I know. I don’t know everything. I also understand that I was in the locker room preparing for a game. I don’t know what happened over the course of the process with the footballs. I was preparing for my own job, doing what I needed to do.

Q: A few years ago you said you liked the ball deflated. You were quoted saying you like throwing a deflated ball. Explain that comment in the context of what you’re dealing with this week.

TB: I obviously read that I said that. I like them at the way that I like them, which is at 12.5. To me, that’s a perfect grip for the football. I think that particular term, deflated or inflated, whatever norm you’re using, you could probably use. I would never do anything outside of the rules of play. I would never have someone do something that I thought was outside the rules.

Q: So you never knowingly played with a football that was under 12.5-pounds?

TB: No.

Q: Have you tried to find out why the balls were under-inflated?

TB: That’s a great question. I think there are a lot of people that have more information than me. I only know what I’ve kind of gone through and the process I’ve taken as part of the game and the postgame, as well as trying to prepare for the Super Bowl. Yeah, I have questions, too. But there’s nobody that I know that can answer the questions that I have. I just have tried my best to focus on what I need to do, to be prepared for Seattle.

Q: If you know the look and feel of the football that you like, do you think there could have been other games where you played with an under-inflated football?

TB: I don’t know. Like I said, once I’m out on the field, I’m playing. I have no thought of the football at that point. I’m thinking about the defense, I’m thinking about the execution of the play and what I need to do. I’m not thinking about how the football feels. I grip the football –

Q: Are you wondering if you’ve played with an under-inflated ball before?

TB: I have no idea. I have no idea. This was the first that I’ve heard of it. Obviously on Monday morning, was the first that I heard of it.

Q: If it’s found that someone improperly tampered with the balls, is it important to you that someone is held accountable?

TB: I’m not the one that imposes [that] type of accountably. It’s discipline and all that, that’s not really my job. Obviously I’d like to know what happened, as you all would, too. In the meantime, I’m going to try to do the best I can to play against the Seahawks. Because I can’t do anything with what’s happened in the past. I have to just go forward with the most awareness I can going forward and trying to be the best I can be for our team.

Q: How does it make you feel that they’re calling your team cheaters?

TB: You know, I think a big part of playing here is trying to ignore the outside forces and influences and people that are maybe fans of our team or not fans of your team or fans of yourself or not fans of yourself. Like I said, everybody is entitled to an opinion. Those opinions rest with those people. I think you can just go out and try to be the best you can be, deal with people with respect, with honesty, with integrity, have a high moral standard. I’ve always really tried to exemplify that as an athlete. I’ll continue to try to do that.

Q: Does this motivate you guys?

TB: We’ve had a lot of motivation. I would say we’ve got a lot of motivation as a team. I think our team has overcome a lot of adversity this year. I think sometimes in life the biggest challenges end up being the best things that happen in your life. We’ve overcome a lot of those this year as a team. So, we can rally around one another and support one another. You can be the best teammate you can possibly be and you can go out and support each other and try to go win a very important game.

Q: Did you address your teammates today and if so, what did you say to them?

TB: Those are very personal things with my teammates. That was very personal comments.

Q: Did you see the footballs before they went to the referees?

TB: Yeah. It’s always the same process. I get here – the playoffs I got here pretty early before the games. Then I go in there and I choose however many balls are necessary for the games. Sometimes it’s 12, 16, 18, 24. This last particular game was 24. I felt them. They were perfect. I wouldn’t want anyone touching those. I would zip those things up and lock them away until I got out on the field and an opportunity to play with them. That’s what I thought I was doing.

Q: We’re you surprised when you heard those footballs had been deflated by two pounds?

TB: Absolutely. That was very surprising to me.

Q: One of your teammates said this was a media thing. Is that your feeling? Is there a feeling behind closed doors that this is being blown out of proportion?

TB: No, it’s very serious. This is a very serious topic. Obviously the integrity of the sport is very important. I think there’s another focus that we have also as a team that guys are very focused on our opponent and the things that we need to do to try to be successful. Everyone is trying to figure out what happened. But at the same time, you have to prepare for the Seahawks also.

Q: You laughed this off on Monday on the radio. Now you’re more somber about it. What happened between Monday and today?

TB: Look, that was real early in the morning. I got home at 12, one o’clock and woke up to do the radio interview and I was very shocked to hear it. I almost laughed it off thinking it was more sour grapes than anything. Then it ends up being a very serious thing when you start learning the things that –

Q: When the start of the second half was delayed and the balls were swapped out, how did you guys on the sideline not know what was going on on the field with respect to the footballs?

TB: I don’t think anybody knew there was an issue with the balls. I think they said, ‘The balls are not ready for play.’ And then I turn around in the huddle and the ball was ready for play. So, I didn’t think anything of it.

Q: Nobody said anything to you on the sideline? It was a good minute delay.

TB: I wasn’t paying attention to what was happening at that time. I don’t remember. Everything was happening obviously so fast in the middle of the game. I was thinking about the series, to go out there and the execution of the game.

Q: The officials didn’t say a word to you?

TB: No.

Q: Do you feel like you had an unfair advantage over the Colts?

TB: I feel like we won the game fair and square. We ended up playing a great opponent and I thought our team went out and played a great game offensively, defensively [and] special teams. It was a great accomplishment to reach the AFC Championship, to win the AFC Championship and then to have the opportunity to play in the Super Bowl. That was a great feeling after the game. Obviously the next few days and hearing the football issue has taken away from a little bit of that, but hopefully we’ll rally around one another to bring it back to the task at hand which is to try to go out and be the best we can be.

Q: Is this a moment to just say ‘I’m sorry,’ to the fans?

TB: I think it’s disappointing that a situation like this happens. Obviously I’d love to be up here talking about [the game], in a very joyful mood. These are the two best weeks of the year if you happen to be one of the two teams still playing. It should be a great two weeks. I’m obviously very disappointed that we have to be having a press conference like this. I wish I could give you more answers or the answers that you guys were looking for. But I don’t have some of those answers.

Q: For the fans that are watching and looking into that camera, what do you say?

TB: I’m not sure. What would you like me to say? I’m not quite sure.

Q: Does the league have a responsibility to button this up so everybody can move on?

TB: I think they’ll do however they see fit. You know, I think that’s up to their responsibility to do whatever they want to do. That’s kind of usually what happens anyway. Like I said, I know they’re doing their investigation. I don’t know what will happen after that.

Q: Do you feel like you’re hanging in the wind?

TB: No, I think we’re preparing for the Super Bowl. I think this is obviously something we’re having to address, but at the same time, I think we’re focused on trying to go out and beat the Seahawks.

Q: Did the league investigators talk to you?

TB: Not yet.

Q: You said earlier that first the issue seemed minor and then you became it was more serious. What was it that convinced you of the seriousness?

TB: I just wasn’t, obviously, aware Monday morning of everything that had happened. So just as I learned more, you understand that there’s more than what I initially –

Q: What’s so serious about it to you?

TB: Just the integrity of the game. I think that’s a very important issue to always be mindful of as an athlete, and fair play. I think we set a great example for the younger athletes, the younger kids, the college kids, the high school kids. We want to be the ones to set the great example.

Q: Are you frustrated by this process? Are you surprised by the process of what the story has become? What do you hope the end result is going forward?

TB: I’m not sure if I have a hope. I haven’t put much thought into that. It’s been just a short period of time. I’d really love to go out there and play a great game. Obviously the NFL would love to figure out what happened in this situation. I try to keep everything in perspective. I’m happy we have an opportunity to play in the next game. obviously I’m disappointed by the footballs of last game, but I can’t do anything about what happened. I can only try to – I can only do something going forward.

Q: The league has not spoken to or contacted you yet?

TB: No, but they may. They may. I think that’s obviously their choice.

Q: Do you find that odd though?

TB: Sure, yeah, they might. They might.

Q: It’s odd that they haven’t at this point. You’re the quarterback and you’re the center of this story right now and the league’s officials haven’t talked to you indicates to a lot of people they’re letting this drag on.

TB: I’m not sure.

Q: Have you been told they will talk to you?

TB: I’m not sure.

Q: There are people who are going to say, ‘You’re so familiar with the equipment, how could you not know?’ What would you say to them?

TB: I addressed that a little bit earlier. Like I said, I don’t put any thought into the footballs after I choose them. When you’re out there playing in front of 70,000 people, like a home crowd, you don’t think about [it]. You’re just reacting to the game. I don’t certainly think about the football. I just assume it’s the same one I approved in the pregame.

Q: Do you break the balls in during practice?

TB: We break them in in practice, certainly sometimes. Yeah, we definitely do that. It’s different from game to game. Some days one ball may feel good; the next day it may not. It depends on maybe how, I don’t know, the humidity in the air or how old the ball was. There are a lot of variables with obviously Mother Nature and the balls. Whatever feels good that day, those are the ones I would typically choose.

Q: Those are the same ones that Bill Belichick squirts water on in practice?

TB: Yeah, he does that a lot. It could be, yeah. It definitely could be.

Q: You said you didn’t want the balls to be touched after you approved them. You didn’t notice that 15 percent of the air was out of the ball when you started using it? It didn’t strike you during the first half?

TB: I didn’t feel any different. I would just assume that it was the same thing. Like I said, once I get the ball, I’m dropping back and reading the coverage and throwing the ball. I’m not –

Q: Basketball players would know if the ball was off after taking two shots. Baseball players could pick up a bat and know if it was less than ounce different. You’re asking us to believe that you couldn’t tell 15 percent of the football was deflated and you didn’t notice?

TB: I wouldn’t know on a particular play. It was a very wet, cold, windy night. Like I said –

Q: But [Colts linebacker] D’Qwell Jackson noticed.

TB: I don’t know. I don’t do that. I get the snap, I drop back, I throw the ball. I grip it and I try to throw the ball. That the extent of me touching the football. I don’t sit there and try to squeeze it and determine that. if that’s what the Colts wanted to do, then that’s what they wanted to do. That’s what their decision was. But I certainly didn’t. No, I did not recognize that. I did not feel a difference between the first half and the second half when supposedly they were inflated to the original or even more inflated. I didn’t notice any difference. I didn’t obviously think there was anything different between halves.

Q: When you initially tested the balls, did you think you would have noticed if the balls were under-inflated at that time?

TB: I don’t know. I guess it’s a challenging thing. I’m not squeezing the balls. That’s not part of my process. I grab it, I feel the lace, I feel the leather, I feel the tack on the ball. That’s really what you go for. It’s not like I ever squeeze the football. I just grip the football. I think there’s maybe a little bit of a difference of how I do that.

Q: What about the fact that you had better numbers after they exchanged the balls?

TB: Yeah. Like I said, I didn’t think any differently in the second half as I did in the first half. I know we had a great second half. It was due to great execution by a lot of great football player. Like I said, I know that’s obviously what they said. They inflated them. I didn’t notice a difference. I wish I could tell you something different. I just didn’t notice a difference.

Q: Bill Belichick said the team will inflate the balls over the minimum requirement from now on. Is that going to be an adjustment if 12.5 pounds is what you like?

TB: I don’t think that would make much of a difference. Like I said, I didn’t feel any difference between what was a 13-pound football or an 11-pound football the other night. That is pretty irrelevant to me.

Q: Will you lobby the league to change the rules surrounding this situation?

TB: What situation, what process would that be – about us breaking in our own balls?

Q: Making sure the balls are the proper weight throughout the game.

TB: Yeah, if they want to do that I have no problem with that. I certainly wouldn’t want them to take away us breaking the balls in. I think that’s a great thing for all the quarterbacks to have the balls in play that they want to use. Everybody has a preference. Some guys like them round and some guys like them thin. Some guys like them tacky. Some guys like them brand new. Some guys like old balls. They’re all different. And it’s leather. [When] every batch comes, they’re different. You’ve got to feel them and you try to go out and you try to use the ones that you like the best, the ones that you use in practice. You want to go out there and try to have the most possible consistency you can to go in the game with.

Q: Will you try to get the league to change the rules so you never handle a ball that isn’t the proper weight?

TB: Absolutely, if they want to check that, I would love for them to be at 12.5. Like I said, I think that’s the perfect fit for me. I know there are other quarterbacks, like I said, that may prefer more than that, but that’s what works for me. It’s all a very individual thing.

Q: Is it possible the refs may have missed this?

TB: I’m not a conspiracy theorist. I don’t know what happened. I have no explanation for it. I don’t know what happened between the time that I touched it – really until Monday morning, I had no idea what happened with the balls.

Q: Who handles the balls after the refs hand it back to team custody?

TB: I have no idea. That’s not part of my process.

Q: Is it a ball boy or equipment manager?

TB: I have no idea. I’m preparing for the game. I would never be a part of that.

Q: Who handles the footballs during the week? If you say you like a certain ball for the game, where does that ball go?

TB: The quarterbacks always, we’ll throw the balls, and if we like a ball, then we throw it aside.

Q: Has the NFL contacted your reps, agent, anything?

TB: I’m not sure, I’d say that. They may or may not have. I’m supposed to talk to my agent after and that may be one of the things that he wants to talk about.

Q: Have you seen them on-site at all here?

TB: No.

Q: Have you heard from former players or teammates about this controversy?

TB: I’ve had a lot of great support from a lot of people and I think in a situation like this, it’s a very … Like I said, sometimes some of the toughest things you deal with end up being the best things because you realize the people that you can rely on that love you and support you through something like this. I appreciate all their support. I tell them, ‘I’m OK. Things are going to be fine. This isn’t ISIS. No one’s dying.’ But we’ll get through this and hopefully we can really start preparing for Seattle and get our mind focused there because they’re going to take all my mental energy for the next 10 days.

Q: Do you think this got blown out of proportion for absolutely no reason?

TB: I think the integrity of the game is very important. Yeah, integrity of the game is very important.

Q: Have you reached out to the equipment staff to see if they did anything to the footballs?

TB: Yeah, and they haven’t, and I believe them, and they also know how I like the balls, and I tell them how great they are before the game – ‘Perfect job, great job’. So, they know how I like it, and that’s exactly the way they are.

Q: You and Bill Belichick both said that you don’t know what happened, though you are generally regarded as being two of the most prepared guys in football. If you were sitting here or back at home, would you believe that you guys don’t know anything about how the footballs were deflated, or would you be skeptical?

TB: Everybody can have an opinion, and I think that whatever opinion people have, that’s OK by me. I think I put myself in this position where I can stand up here and deal with that. I know what I go through on daily basis. I know the process that I take. I also know what’s in my control and what’s out of my control. I think a lot of my whole life has been about focusing on the things that are in my control and trying to do the best with that opportunity and the best I can with it. If I don’t know something, I don’t know something. I don’t know what to say other than that. I just know the process that I go through and I’m very comfortable with it. Hopefully we can go forward and play a great game a week from Sunday.

Q: When you were driving home Sunday, is this the last thing you thought you’d be talking about in your press conference?

TB: Yeah, absolutely. Like I said, I had no – yeah. Thanks guys. I think Stace [Vice President of Media Relations Stacey James] said, ‘That’s it,’ about 10 minutes ago, so thank you guys.

——– 000 ——–

Spygate. Deflategate. What’s next? How about Greatgate? That’s the one where the league is investigating the New England Patriots for simply being great, playing at a level that isn’t supposed to be possible given the NFL’s infatuation with parity, the goal of which is to have all 32 go 8-8 over the 16-game schedule.

Uh, Let’s Take that Back

Already, a key aspect of the story proved to be untrue. It was initially reported that Deflategate began after Indianapolis Colts linebacker D’Qwell Jackson he intercepted Brady in the AFC title game. Wrong. Jackson himself said he noticed nothing wrong with the football he intercepted against New England in last week’s AFC championship game.

“The NFL has a detailed protocol when it comes to game balls. Per Rule 2, Section 1 of the book, each team is supposed to bring 12 official Wilson brand balls ‘bearing the signature of the Commissioner of the League, Roger Goodell.’ 

“Precisely two hours, 15 minutes prior to kickoff, all the footballs are checked in the referee locker room by the head ref, in this case Walt Anderson.

“‘The Referee shall be the sole judge as to whether all balls offered for play comply with these specifications,’ the rulebook reads. ‘A pump is to be furnished by the home club, and the balls shall remain under the supervision of the Referee until they are delivered to the ball attendant just prior to the start of the game.'”

If the referee is the “sole judge” of the integrity of the footballs, and the balls were properly inspected … do we have to draw you a map.

“It wasn’t the ball that caused New England to advance to the Super Bowl. It was its offensive line and defensive secondary and the frightening prospect of Brady getting to use play-action. The Pats win no matter what.” — Dan Wetzel, Yahoo! Sports.

It also should be noted that as part of standard NFL procedure, teams are allowed “to condition” footballs “to their liking” for game use. Some like the balls scuffed. Some like them sticky. It varies from team to team. (Yahoo!)

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For Patriots’ fans on THE PLANET, we love Deflategate because we know how the team is going to respond. It’s going to circle the wagons, tell themselves its “us against everybody else,” and then go out and blow away Seattle.

Have a great weekend!

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“Accept, thou shrine of my dead saint, / Instead of dirges, this complaint. / And for sweet flowers to crown thy hearse, / Receive a strew of [s]weeping verse.” — Henry King, “The Exequy, (1657).

“OPEN THE WINDOW, AUNT MILLIE.”

LOVE TO ALL.