BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION MAY 16-8, 2025) — Several UFOs were spotted circling THE PLANET. Our crack team directed them in for landing. Here they be: The Gift Outright–It’s a sign of how desperate Democrats have become when you see them raising a stink about […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY MAY 14, 2025) — Taxpayers, you know the drill. Budget time rolls around, the FY26 spending plan. Pull down your trousers. Take a deep breath. Try not to complain as Two-Pete government sticks it in once more, another 5%. They don’t even lube […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY MAY 12, 2025) –The notable aspect about the executive whitewashes … er, summaries released by the City of Bitchfield conspirators (mayor, slohoc kummiteeem, superintendent, Mercer, PHS administrators, council prez, councilor, city solicitor, Mercer denizens, the usual gang of idiots, and Jerry Mathers as […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION MAY 9-11) — Doing spring housecleaning ], there’s always a few odd items to be found in the corners and under the buffet. Then it will be your turn with THE PLANET‘s talking stick. USA! USA!–Looking forward to the papacy of […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY MAY 7, 2025) — From the outset of the PHS/PSD scandal–and it is that, make no mistake about it–THE PLANET called it: “The fix is in.” We’ve been around long enough to know. This one’s a doozy … and a don’tzy, big enough […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY MAY 5, 2025) — Groucho, the Secret Word for today is “synthetic.” THE PLANET will explain why to conclude today’s column. Meanwhile … Back at the turn of the millennium, native son Larry Bossidy, at the end of a long career hitting it […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION MAY 2-4, 2025) — One of the best positives coming out of the recent school department scandal has been the lesson in civics. When citizens in sufficient number express outrage over corruption, The Suits get the message. Of course, what they […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY APRIL 30, 2025) — THE PLANET is heartened by the actions of parent Ciara Batory, who refused to accept the Bitchfield slocho department’s refusal of her request for information. We should also mention in this respect Angel Breault, who made public on social […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENT (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY APRIL 28, 2025) — Seems that helzapoppin’ with respect to the PHS/school department/school committee scandal. Drugs, sex, and rock’n roll? Used to be confined to the rock-star life. Now, courtesy of Bitchfield school administrators, it’s the way of school corridors. A reasonable question: […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION APRIL 25-7, 2025) — The city council’s hand-wringing over the slooch committee’s refusal to release the report on the investigation into the multiple scandals plaguing Pittsfield High School can be taken with a crumb of Saltines. Moldy Saltines. Don’t get fooled […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY APRIL 23, 2025) — When it comes to the school department/PHS scandal, the Pitiful pols of Pissfield, aka the bereft blockheads of Bitchfield, want it both ways. They want to keep the report hidden, and they want the public to stop pressuring them […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY APRIL 21, 2025) — Today, THE PLANET dedicates our column to our friend, colleague, collaborator, and compatriot, Dave Bubriski. How does one sum up the loss of a friend in a way that conveys the depth of feeling and strikes the right tone, […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION APRIL 18-20, 2025) — In Bitchfield, where down is up and over is under, the sinking ship is fleeing the rats. Typically, it’s the other way around, but the city breeds mighty dumb political rats. Seems that The Suits have given […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY APRIL 15, 2025) — The coverup often overshadows the actual malfeasance. Bitchfield’s entire political cadre is about to learn that painful lesson, one that history teaches with eagerness, force, and certainty. Already the cost has been enormous: The continuing erosion of public trust […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION APRIL 11-4, 2025) — Sara “Miss Jane” Hathaway, the overripe failed mayor and old maid Les Miserable, now mucks up We The People’s business as a member of the Bitchfield Ship of Fools known as the school committee … rather, soholc […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY APRIL 7, 2025) — Now that Bitchfield officially stands without a representative city council, school committee, or mayor, the mannequins occupying those offices feel fully free to act unencumbered by Mary Jane and Joe Kapanski. Sure, this has been the case somewhat in […]
