BY DAN VALENTI

PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY

(FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION, NOV. 16-18, 2018) — A tax cut for Pittsfield?

Of course, it all depends on how you define it. By the strictest definition, Mayor Linda Tyer can truthfully lay claim to being the first mayor in 25 years to offer a reduction in rates for homeowners and businesses. For that, THE PLANET offers arias and trochees. It addresses a long-standing hope among Pittsfield’s hammered taxpayers on both sides of the tax split. Politically, the move is understandable.

THE PLANET defines it with a question: Will the overall cost to homeowners and businesses living in the city — including taxes, which are a key component in the equation — go up or down? A look at the complete picture reveals the bad though hardly surprising news. It will cost Mary Jane and Joe Kapanski and Little Guy Business Inc. more to survive another year in a dying town that poison politics, long predating Linda Tyer, sent to intensive care.

Was the token cut the result of anticipatory 2019 municipal politics, when the corner office is up for grabs again after a four-year wait? THE PLANET has the answer, obtained through the microphone hidden in a Ming vase (pronounced: “vahse”) in the mayor’s office. We obtained a copy of a secret conversation between the mayor and her director of finance, Matthew “Kufflinks” Kerwood. Here’s the key exchange:

MAYOR: So, Matt, what kind of shape are we in?

KUFFLINKS: The truth? (MAYOR NODS). In a word, lousy. Debt service is killing us, the tax base is shrinking, union raises are out of control, the city is aging, the deadbeats are sucking services dry, drug trafficking has robbed us of a generation of young people — those that haven’t moved out because there are no jobs or affordable night life. 

MAYOR: Yeah, but I’m up for re-election next year. I can’t tell people that. Let’s think real hard. What can we do?

KUFFLINKS: (BOW TIE SPINS AND LIGHTS UP) I’ve got it!

MAYOR: What? A terrific headache?

KUFFLINKS: No. A tax decrease!

MAOYR: Brilliant! But how can we lower taxes when we keep raising the cost of government, to say nothing of taking care of the special interests and mismanaging debt service?

KUFFLINKS: Easy. (FIRES UP AN EXCEL SPREADSHEET ON HIS LAPTOP AND TAPS A FEW KEYS). We give ’em a tiny cut here, and we nail them there later, after you win in 2019.

MAYOR: What a man!

———- 000 ———-

A careful look shows you how Tyer and Kufflinks simply played with numbers. Under the plan, the residential rate will drop from the current $20.01 to $19.42 (0.97%), a $9.48 cent decrease to the “average” homeowners’ property taxes. But let’s look at what T&K didn’t say.

They didn’t tell you many things.

• They didn’t tell your that the tax for businesses on personal property will rise 12.4%.
• They didn’t tell you that the “average” valuation on homes will rise from the present $181,500 to $186,000. Thousands of homes will see an increase in taxes.
• They didn’t tell you that the miniscule tax reduction should be far greater than it is because of the unanticipated $2.5 million more the state sent to Pittsfield. That’s taxpayers money, to0, and such a windfall could have easily enabled a dip at least three times as much.
• They didn’t tell you the real reason why they failed to use free cash, which, as Ward 4 councilor Chris Connell said at the Tuesday council meeting, isn’t free at all. Connell spoke out for taxpayers, noting that the millions of free cash consists “of the excess dollar amount that residents paid last year that we didn’t spend.” Well spoken, CC.
• They didn’t tell you the numbers do not include upcoming hits for sewer upgrades and the Taconic High School buildout. Connell asked Kerwood about the THS hit. Kerwood said there wouldn’t be a hit … until 2021. In other words, the tax “decrease” is being artificially being propped up by delaying the pain sure to come from the unnecessary school construction.

This “tax cut” is a “rate reduction” that will fail to reduce costs, especially for what’s left of the middle class. It’s all about election year politics.

Have a great weekend, everybody.

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“If they don’t give you a seat at the table, bring a folding chair” — Shirley Chisholm.

“OPEN THE WINDOW, AUNT MILLIE.”

LOVE TO ALL.

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