BY DAN VALENTI

PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY

(FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY JULY 3, 2019) — They couldn’t fit on one stage, so 20 of the 24 trying to win the Democrat Party’s nomination for president found themselves on two stages, two consecutive nights.

THE PLANET‘s first question concerns timing. We’re eight months before the first primaries, and we have this? We ask a rhetorical question, given how politics has become a continuous run for election or re-election. This holds true on all levels, even in backwaters such as Pittsfield, Mass., where, for example, the moment the new district attorney gets office, she sets as her first priority the fundraisers designed to keep her there. The People’s business can wait.

Of the Dems’ 24-pack, can you imagine being the four lightweights left out? We have $500 in Monopoly money for anyone, including the four, who can name this quartet. As for the dreaded others, organizers treated the electorate to the A and B teams. The scrubs went first, and the only significant matter decided was the determination that Megan Rapinoe has more testosterone than Pete Buttigieg.

Buttigieg.

We bet he does.

Oh, and Beto O’Rourke answered the first question of the first night in Spanish. It was the worst case of pandering since Deanna Ruffer told Linda Tyer the Tyler Street garbage cans were “dynamic and vibrant.” THE PLANET to O’Rourke: You’re in America. We speak English here.

———- ooo ———-

The A-Team included such household names as Eric Swalwell and Andrew Yang. If these are the big guns, Trump can retain Mulligan as his caddy on the golf course. He won’t break a sweat. There are only four names worth noting as we move to death throes of the 2020 election: Joe Biden, Kamala Harris, Bernie Sanders, and Elizabeth Warren.

Biden — Syracuse grad. 40 years in the Senate. Eight as VP. The party’s young radicals want to turn that into “too white, too old, too male.” That’s how out of touch the party’s “new” thinking is, insisting on beating themselves up over peripheral issues such as race and gender. Biden stayed above the fray. He adopted a presidential strategy when the other nine tried to gang-tackle him. Despite what the Mainstream Media wants you to believe with their reporting, Biden walked away untouched, and all the national polls still show him in the lead. He’s the only Democrat with a shot against Trump.

Harris — If you didn’t know it already, she reminded you: She’s black (sort of). She’s female. She plays the race card from both sides and the gender card from the bottom. In an obviously rehearsed rant, she took aim at Biden, starting with: “I do not believe you’re a racist.” Harris then told him he was the biggest racist since Boss Bull. She claimed “That girl is me” in a tall tale about busing, leaving out her wealthy upbringing in another country. Harris may be flavor of the month, but like all fads, this one has a short shelf life. What a phony.

Sanders — The Mad Scientist of the bunch and the most entertaining. He zealously flogs “democratic socialism,” a phrase that, ironically, sounds to the ear like Germany’s “national socialism” of the 1930s. On many levels, THE PLANET would love to see him facing Trump next year. At least he stands for something, though, according to the party’s acolytes, he’s another one too old, too white, too male.

Warren — Granny of The Beverly Hillbillies but without spring tonic. Solid on the stump but only when she’s preaching to the choir. Her “home-spun” act comes off as an embarrassing “Please, like me. Like me, please oh please.” The faux Indian (the Fukcawee tribe) should cut her losses, endorse Biden, then stump for the ticket’s number 2 spot.

———- ooo ———-

President Trump had the best review of the debates: “Boring!”

The precise moment Trump won re-election came when the candidates were asked who supported free, 100% health care for illegal aliens. Everyone shot up their hands. Trump, as usual, had the last word: “All Democrats just raised their hands for giving millions of illegal aliens unlimited health insurance. How about taking care of American citizens first?”

Game. Set. Match.

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“The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age” — Lucille Ball.

“OPEN THE WINDOW, AUNT MILLIE.”

LOVE TO ALL.

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