BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION MAY 31-JUNE 2, 2024) — “The road to Acapulco is very hard indeed, and it don’t get no easier if you haven’t any weed” — New Riders of the Purple Sage. Yeah, but the road to Bitchfield makes Acapulco look like […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY MAY 30, 2024) — Who started the rumor we shall never know. “The ink pad is dry!” The panicked call echoed within city hall. It send shockwaves throughout the building until council president Voltron the Porkchop, looking for a secret place to wank-off […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY MAY 27, 2024) — THE PLANET doesn’t have much to say today as we bring to a conclusion this long weekend. It’s a day America sets aside to remember those who paid the ultimate sacrifice in war. Ask those who have been through war, […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY ADD 1 SUNDAY MAY 26 — THE PLANET received this release from the Pittsfield Police Department, which we share with our readers: On May 25, 2024 at approximately 6:50 PM, the Pittsfield Police Dept., Pittsfield Fire Dept., and County Ambulance responded to the area of 664 West […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY MAY 22, 2024) — Today, THE PLANET discusses a few odd and recent items. Brain Drain–THE PLANET has obtained an exclusive look at the recent brain scan of Bitchfield city council president Voltron the Porkchop. Seems our Right Honorable Good Friend claims his vast collection of […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI ARTS A review of 4,000 Miles by Amy Herzog, now running through June 1 at the Berkshire Theatre Festival’s Unicorn Theater, Stockbridge. Cast: Evan Silverstein (Leo), Gabriela Torres (Bec), Alison Ye (Amanda), and Maria Tucci (Vera). Directed by Lizzie Gottlieb. 1 hour, 50 minutes, no intermission. Box office 413-997-4444. BerkshireTheatreGroup.org. PLANET […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION MAY 17-9, 2024) — Our ideological, guilt-before-innocence times have the Devil’s Advocate working overtime. In short supply: reason and common sense. In surplus, irrationality and prejudice. No, the sky isn’t falling; THE PLANET assures you despite the assertions of Chicken Little. […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY Final of Two Parts (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY MAY 15, 2024) — Don’t you just love the Bike Mafia. THE PLANET does. Not only do they want to despoil Springside Park, but it wants Pittsfield taxpayers to pick up the tab. This audacity comes after Alison McGee, […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY First of Two Parts (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY MAY 13, 2024) — Recently, someone asked us about the continuing delay in building the mountain bike complex at Springside Park on upper North Street in Bitchfield. THE PLANET found it a pertinent query, since the ambitious–and ambitiously expensive– […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY A U.S. Constitutional Cornerstone: A person is innocent until proven guilty. For a citizen not formally charged with a crime, premature guilty verdict is personally and socially devastating. (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION MAY 10-2, 2024) — If you peruse any high school yearbook or media coverage […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY MAY 8, 2024) — Today THE PLANET shares the details of the most horrific development now taking place on planet earth. As you know, there’s a ton of mayhem from which to choose. It’s not the phony kangaroo trial of President Trump. It […]
BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY MAY 6, 2024) — Crisis averted. As so many of you reminded us, THE PLANET went dark for about 24 hours Thursday evening into Friday. We heard from a bunch of you, including two former mayors, a bunch of ex-councilors, and a truckload […]
