Archive | January, 2025
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BITCHFIELD DEBT APPROACHES $1 BILLION (WITH A ‘B’) BUCKS … A LUMPY-VOLTRON-KUFFLINKS PRODUCTION

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION JAN. 31-February. 2, 2025) — On the subject of debt, the city of Bitchfield is an expert. THE PLANET has the figures to prove it. Mayor Lumpy and the Profiles in Courage on the city council have quite a pickle on […]

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KORRUPT-O-METER® PROTYPE GETS WORKOUT AT 8-minute BITCHFIELD KOWNSIL MEETING … plus … NEWS FLASH!!: MAYOR LUMPY SPELLS ‘of’ AS “pf”

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY JAN. 29, 2025) — Eight minutes. 480 seconds. That’s all it took for the Gutless Wonders on the city council to meet and adjourn. President Peter White, aka Voltron the Porkchop, got the meeting off to a flying start when he brought the […]

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SPELLING BEE BRINGS HOME A WINNER, SOME GOOD MEMORIES, AND A BELLY LAUGH AT THE JUDGES

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY JAN. 27, 2025) — THE PLANET extends congratulations to Emily Escalon-Brizuela from Reid Middle School for winning this year’s Jonathan Levine Middle School Spelling Bee. Same to second-placed Averi Olds from Herberg and all the young scholars who competed. Spelling bees were standard […]

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PITTSFIELD CO-OP BRINGS IN TOP-GUN MIKE DALY TO CLEAN HOUSE AMID ACQUISITION RUMORS … meanwhile … VICTORIA MAY’S FEDERAL LAWSUIT LOOMS IN BACKGROUND

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY JAN. 22, 2025) — The recent news that former Berkshire Bank CEO Mike Daly came out of retirement to head Pittsfield Cooperative Bank is good news for the local institution. It’s a move THE PLANET applauds. Daly is a proven entity, taking Berkshire […]

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MAYOR LUMPY GIVE STATE OF BITCHFIELD ADDRESS … SIX ATTENDEES DIE FROM BOREDOM, FIVE FROM LAUGHING TO DEATH OVER THE LIES, and many cases of irreversible brain damage.

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY, TRUMP INAUGURATION DAY, 2025) — For those who may not have attended mayor Peter Marchetti’s state-of-the-city speech, THE PLANET presents this copy. It has been notarized as “true to form” by the accounting firm that annually examines the city’s books, so you know […]

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MANSLAUGHTER CONVICTION ILLUSTRATES TRUE STATE OF DRUG TRADE, PUBLIC SAFETY IN BITCHFIELD … plus … GARBAGE IN, GARBAGE OUT … or … THE CONTINUED TRASHING OF BITCHFIELD

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY ADD 1 JAN 17 p.m. — THE PLANET received this from the office of D.A. Tim Shugrue. It illustrates the state of the state in Pittsfield. The action took place on King Street, behind Robbins and Dewey avenues, and John Street. Password is: Laquan. Good work by […]

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PEDOFIELD MAYOR FAILS ANOTHER ONE

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY JAN. 13, 2025) — The funniest part of the Pedofield School Committee’s meeting last week had to be when His Rotundness, mayor Peter Marchetti, blew kisses to the students who spoke. That the kids were “coaxed” (not “bribed,” mind you) to do this THE […]

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PHS STUDENT: DID CURTIS, ESKO COAX STUDENTS TO APPEAR AT SCHOOL COMMITTEE MEETING? … ONE OF THEM INJECTS ‘THE RACE CARD’ INTO DELIBERATIONS

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION JAN. 10-2, 2025) — Once again, THE PLANET called it, and we have the witnesses to prove it in any kangaroo court. Prior to Wednesday’s Pittsfield School Committee meeting, we predicted that supt. Jumpin’ Joe Curtis, with his bag lady PHS […]

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SKI FATALITY AT JIMINEY PEAK … plus … ‘L’AFFAIRE PEDODOPA’: OFFICIALS CLAIM OF NO KNOWLEDGE IS LAUGHABLE BEYOND FARCE

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY ADD 1 WEDNESDAY JAN 8 — THE PLANET has received this from the office of Tim Shugrue, Berkshire County District Attorney: On Tuesday, January 7th, Alex Kemp (19 years old: New Jersey) was pronounced deceased at Baystate Medical Center following a ski accident. The incident occurred on […]

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SCHOOL COMMITTEE CHAIR CAMERON RESPONDS TO THE PLANET’S QUERIES ABOUT INVESTIGATION; REVEALS A SECOND PROBE AND A SECOND LAW FIRM

BY DAN VALENTI PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY (FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THE WEEKEND EDITION JAN. 3-5, 2025) — On Dec. 27, 2024, THE PLANET contacted Bill Cameron, chairman of the Pittsfield School Committee with questions pertaining to the hiring of the Springfield law firm of Bulkley Richardson Gelinas to conduct an “independent investigation” into the […]

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