By DAN VALENTI

PLANET VALENTI News and Commentary

(FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND EDITION, MAY 23-25, 2014) — Having started a radio talk show from scratch; having given birth this journalistic website from oblivion to this, its 970th edition; and now having created a nascent television show, THE PLANET knew from the start that it would take some time, probably a few months or more, for the TV show to find its footing. Three episodes are now “in the can.” The hunt continues.

THE PLANET, on the set of PV-TV (Photo: Dave Bubriski).

The process remains the same for all creative and artistic endeavors. It begins conceptually, as an idea in the artist’s head. The heavy lifting comes in taking the idea and introducing it to reality, where the idea meets the act.

On no-budget local-access TV and with an all-volunteer crew that rotates in and out depending on availability, 90% of the ideas, interesting though they may be, will have to remain unproduced, there not being the budget, the actors, the writers, and the professional technical staff to bring it all together. The other 10% happens, though it never matches what we picture in our mind.

Thus, with Planet Valenti Television — PV-TV Starring Dan Valenti, the key is to “stay within yourself,” as the sports cliche puts it — and then take one step beyond, over the line. That’s the only way you can mark the limits: by exceeding them. The idea is to each week push the limits a little farther, if possible, and to ALWAYS have fun, regardless of what anyone else may think. That we have done!

And it has been fun, though at times — and again, this typifies the early stages of an ongoing creative effort — we feel rather like McMurphy in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, when he tries to lift that gigantic hydration station. He takes bets he can do the impossible, gives it his best, and fails. He redeems victory from this seeming defeat, though, when, as he walks away, he tells all the other brow-beaten patients, “Yeah, well at least I tried.” Say what you will about our efforts on the television, at least we are trying.

Trying to do what, exactly? — To use entertainment and amusement as the vehicle with and through which to address serious and sober topics, for example, the outrageous money-grab now being attempted by Pittsfield Mayor Dan Bianchi with his proposed FY15 budget of $148.1 million (to put that figure in perspective, in 2004, the city operated with a budget of $99 million). On Thursday night’s show, Episode 3, in between the fun, we took viewers through what one watcher called “an in-your-face review” of the city’s finances under The Empty Suit (TES).

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When THE PLANET first envisioned a local call-in show on the telly, we initially thought of a show with all call-ins. Having done 14 years of talk radio, though, we know that the local market isn’t ripe for picking the low fruit that is the privilege of regional to say nothing of national productions. Neither the quality nor the quantity is there to sustain a lively, relevant, local talk show of that type. Of every five calls, two will want to illogically rip you because they don’t like your views (they will never debate you, however! Too scared for that), two will be of such poor intellectual quality that even the little dog gets embarrassed for the caller. That fifth call makes it all worth it, with intelligence, sometimes wit, sometimes wisdom, and often knowledge. So the question becomes: Do you want to play the 20% game?

So far, we do. We do not, however, want only to depend on calls, and we will not Actually, PV-TV will make phoners a secondary or tertiary element. That is the probably the biggest change we’ve made to the show, conceptually. It will still include calls, but it will include much more of THE PLANET’s schtick that we at first envisioned.

The PLANET’s logo (copyright (c) 2014 by Dan Valenti)

Episode 1 featured a number of calls, maybe a dozen of which about eight or so got through, most of them set-ups by The Suits to see if they could rattle The Kid. Not a chance of that, as, actually (again, basing our radio experience of having handled tens of thousands of calls), we had built that into the show. Those types of calls become cream puffs for us, and here’s the reason. They take themselves too seriously, allowing us to handle them with the aplomb of a seasoned stand-up comic crushing a heckler.  So for those callers that were obviously calling in on behalf of Bianchi, we shoved the words of each right back down the choking throats from whence they emerged.

In terms of viewer phone-ins, Episode 2 went dark. We didn’t receive a call. Thus, THE PLANET had to riff, solo,  over a vague theme and fill an hour. We not only did it, but we enjoyed (dare we say, “preferred”) doing it. This probably stems from the fact that we are toiling on public access, which has the blessed advantage of being non-commercial, allowing for a tremendous amount of contentual freedom.

It is starting to sink in: The same freedom we have on THE PLANET website we have on Planet Valenti Television — PV-TV  (with some minor procedural restrictions to follow). In other words, we can do the show the way we want and not worry about pressure from anything or anyone else.

Episode 3 featured two on-air calls plus at least two (possibly more) that we didn’t have the time to take. That worked just about right, for this time, THE PLANET came to the studio more prepared to hog up the airtime for our own fancies.

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The early feedback for PV-TV has been great.  Half has been “Brilliant” and “We love it;” 25% has been “I don’t get it but I like watching it” or “I don’t get it but I have to keep watching, the way you gawk at a car accident;” and 25% has been “You’re lousy” or “You’re immature” — “criticism” of that ilk (“You mother wears combat clogs”). That’s about as analytical as the local apologists for The Suits and The Status Quo ever get. Actually, we can let you in on a little secret: We love the apologists’ reactions more than all the others, because it tells us we’re succeeding in frosting the right sets of balls.

THE PLANET is also delighted in the audience build-up from Episode 1 to 3. Viewership has been growing, and we have noticed a spike on the traffic at PLANET VALENTI DOT COM.  We have two brand names now that have become a force to be reckoned with in local politics. This pleases us for one reason, and one reason only: It provides Mary Jane and Joe Kapanski, the proverbial Little Guy, with (a) a ray of hope, (b) more of a sense that they, in fact, do own the government, and (c) a realization that they can, in fact, get involved and change otherwise doomed fate of the city of Pittsfield that has been assigned to them by the windbag politicians who have made a political killing by ignoring the 85% and catering to the 15%.

The folks who are hip enough to “get” what we’re doing have fallen in love with our cheeky, cheesy, “Uncle Floyd Show” high-wire act, with the clear highlight having been on the three shows to date our “interviews” with TES, The Empty Suit. You have to see these segments to believe them, which you can do either on the Pittsfield Community Television website, on YouTube, and on GooglePlus.

As satire, the wildly popular TES segments make a serious point about the lack of leadership emanating from the corner office and trickling down to every city department. Some “get it,” as we say. Others don’t, usually by making the mistake of taking everything we say or do too blasted personally. Love it or hate it, in good taste or bad, pulling it off or falling flat on our face, The Empty Suit has become a “must watch.” Rest assured, folks, that TES shall remain a regular part of the PV-TV cast. Incidentally, THE PLANET has publicly and privately invited the actual Bianchi on the show. He has thus far refused. We’re only guessing, but he may be tt-t-t-oo s-s-scared to sit down in a live interview and face our questions.

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Planet Valenti Television also has become “must see” TV for everyone interested, however remotely, in Pittsfield’s “swamp politics.” Certainly, we have a saturation following among politicians, department heads, and city employees — plus their allies. The supporters of Mayor Dan Bianchi wouldn’t dare miss a show, if only to be able to tell us what’s wrong with everything we do! THE PLANET also has it on reasonably good authority that Bianchi is among our most avid viewers.

DANCING WITH THE STARS — THE PLANET and THE EMPTY SUIT tango. (Photo: Dave Bubriski)

A rapidly rising number of disenchanted citizens think — correctly, in our view — that Bianchi has blown the city’s last best opportunity to avoid the financial fate of Detroit. They enjoy how we have taken the shortest distance between the two points of (a) the mayor failing them and (b) the lonely place from where they are sitting as citizens, having been abandoned by a mayor who, the evidence suggests, may only be a part-time bugger. He has admitted still working for Global Montello Energy, even though he is supposed to be a full-time mayor. That shortest distance is the “straight line” of hard hitting criticism, and that leads them to THE PLANET, this website, and now to Planet Valenti Television.

The criticism has only just begun. Think we’ve been tough? You haven’t seen anything. THE PLANET shall continue until one of three things happens: (1) Bianchi himself relates and makes an appearance on my show, willing to take my questions; (2) Bianchi recalls his current proposed budget and makes cuts, or (3) he resigns, either willingly or as a result of being forced out by a recall vote.

It will be the mayor’s own words, numbers, actions, and inactions that in the end doom him politically. For example, on Episodes 2 and 3, THE PLANET took Bianchi’s own figures on the proposed FY15 budget and threw them back in his face, drawing loud hurrahs from the Kapanskis and all The Little Guys, and loud Bronx cheers from The Suits and Special Interests. When one of The Suits’ messengers delivers such trenchant feedback as “You stink,” you know that what we’re doing is working!

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Here’s a Facebook exchange between THE PLANET and our Right Honorable Good Friend, Paul Brindle Sr., former mayor of Pittsfield:

Planet Valenti program would be more helpful to Pittsfield if only you gave solitions to the many problems you say we have. Your program today would scare anybody not to come to Pittsfield. Many wonderful things in Pittsfield to be proud of. But today you have forgotten them. Please be more positive. Thanks Paul Brindle.

THE PLANET responded: Jes telling it like it is, PAUL. If you or anyone else wants to hear about how great the city is doing, watch the mayor’s show … or start your own show. Meantime, we roll the way we roll. As a journalist, I learned long ago that you couldn’t tell the truth and have too many “likes” among The Status Quo and The Suits.

Then Bill Heaphy joined the discussion: Mr. Brindle I could not agree with you anymore…. Last weeks show wasn’t any different… Negative negative negative and the interview with Mayor Bianchi was a joke….

Heaphy then posted a second comment: I meant to say the pretend interview with the dummy last week was ridiculous

From Heaphy’s Facebook page, we learn he is “Supervisor of Attendance, Pittsfield, Massachusetts, Oct. 24, 1996 to present.” See, he would have a vested interest in what we say and do, and that’s OK. Heaphy has exercised his right of free speech and has given us criticism of the most valuable kind.

THE PLANET responded to Heaphy: BILLY Now you’re getting it, boy. It was MEANT to be a joke, although it’s not a joke to have a dummy sitting in as “mayor.” (Think about it. You’ll get it much later on!).

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Bottom line is that THE PLANET shall continue in our role as provocateur and agitator, muckraker and yellow journalist, which is to say we shall continue to function as the essential lone-voice champion of republicanism in a city nearly hopelessly gone to the Political Dark Side. As long as we can hoist a pen and/or a microphone, we shall continue to point to The Light, to The Truth.

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“I just want to know about the ruins behind your mind. Do I see a vacuum there, or am I going blind?” — Jimi Hendrix, “Up from the Skies,” Axis: Bold As Love, (1972)

“OPEN THE WINDOW, AUNT MILLIE.”

LOVE TO ALL.