BY DAN VALENTI

PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY

(FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, THURSDAY, JUNE 23, 2016) — The ONLY, and THE PLANET means ONLY argument in favor of a SuperWalmart at the PEDA site is, unfortunately, the winning one. For that reason, the proposal must be approved. Bear with us.

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And in the end, two things happen: (1) The love you make is equal to the love you take, and (2) the council will approve this project. All other criticisms of the use of those anti-precious acres hold true. The arguments against the superstore, however, die with the readings of the reality check the pouty pragmatist must administer. Specifically, Pittsfield must admit it’s a Walmart city. It’s population is old, poor, and distressed. The leftovers consist of gang members, drug pushes and users, the mentally ill, and other assorted creatures and critters of the byways.

The city itself has destroyed what’s left of the middle class with its ruinous tax rate. No legitimate, private sector company has sniffed at the PEDA site in nearly 20 years, so why pretend it will be anything but for the next 20? If you don’t buy that, take one look at the CEO of PEDA, Corydon Thurston. Enter the Marx Brothers‘ Room Service, when Groucho points to Chico and says to a dubious investor, “This is Baravelli. He’s the brains of the organization. [PAUSE] That’ll give you an idea of the organization.”

Simply put, Walmart is the best the city can do, even if it hair lips every Mormon on Bear Creek.

There are no Mormons in Pittsfield, and there is no Bear Creek.

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To refuse this deal would be a mistake, but not the colossal mistakes The Suits orchestrated over the years to ruin Pittsfield, for example —

— Moving BCC four miles out of center city

— Destroying the downtown mall, though twice approved by referendum

— Doing nothing as GE made good on its promise to bolt.

The Suckups Sound Off

Of course, one must hate this project, if only because The Suits favor it. For example, Peter “Fair Wind” White wet himself praising the move of Walmart from Berkshire Crossing to Woodlawn Avenue. Fair Wind, remember, ALWAYS votes the way of his Masters … and Mistresses. Here is Fair Wind on Facebook singing “The Superstore Shuffle”:

• An entirely private investment, without government grants or subsidies, tax abatement deals or other use of public money, according to Waterstone.

• Commitments by the developer to upgrade the look of the Woodlawn Avenue neighborhood, improve traffic flow at the Tyler Street and Dalton Avenue intersection including a new traffic signal, and add public transit stops at the business park site as well as new walkways for pedestrian access.

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The redbird warbles. The mulberry blooms. The fair wind blows.

You have to love Fair Wind’s first point about “private investment, without  government grants or subsidies, tax-abatements deals, or other use of public money.” You will recall Fair Wind had no problem when Richard Stanley pulled off his latest downtown heist, winning five more years (14 total) of “tax abatement.”

Mayor Linda Tyer issued this statement:

“The City of Pittsfield welcomes any developer who expresses an interest in locating a business in our city. As Mayor of Pittsfield, I believe strongly in the right to a due process concerning proposed business developments. This applies to the Waterstone Retail Development proposal.

 This recent proposal now marks the third time, first in 2011 and then in 2013, that Waterstone has pursued the City of Pittsfield, namely the William Stanley Business Park, as a location for its retail enterprise. As it has in the past, we know that the proposed development will lend itself to a spectrum of varying and staunch perspectives about the nature of the development and its place in Pittsfield. This, too, is a part of the process. It is important to realize that while it’s really easy to say no without further discussion, it’s often harder to engage in dialogue that challenges us to consider positions other than our own.  Is there a way to establish a finished product that not only works for the developer, but the neighborhood and landscape as well? Just one of the many questions that is tantamount to this conversation.

 Maintaining a fair and balanced process, in spite of varying perspectives, ensures that we keep our city open to not just this particular project, but potential economic development opportunities in the future.”

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THE PLANET shant parse this statement. That lakebed is dry enough. It should be obvious The Lovely Linda secretly backs this project so much she’s in front of it. Nonetheless, her fence-sitting statement talks about “a fair and balanced process” — you know, like the one she gave taxpayers on the $200 million new high school and also on her new record-spending budget.

We wrap this up with verse:

The dim dominions that have Pittsfield final years

Will yield earlier than thought.

We can only yield to it with tears

And Rue the waste we have bought.

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“Blight and Walmart are the gateway drug for urban decay.” — Sir Tiberius Fruitjuice

“OPEN THE WINDOW, AUNT MILLIE.”

LOVE TO ALL.

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