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FAKOWEE MADNESS … plus … THE BB & THE SCOOP OF THE CENTURY (WOULD YOU BELIEVE, SCOOP OF THE MILISECOND?)

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BY DAN VALENTI

PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY

(FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY JULY 12, 2017) — “You make me Dizzy Miss Lizzie, when you do the stroll.”

SHOWING UP THE FAKOWEESJohn Lennon wrote that prophetic line 50 years ago, and at Berkshire Community College over the weekend, it came true once more. Dizzy Miss Lizzie Warren strolled onto the campus to play footsie with a few hundred of the Loyal Order. This enraptured crowd of True Believers heard their savior and guru preach to the half-a-pitch-off choir about the need to “persist.”

Persist at what? For openers, to be close minded, as her extreme left wing of the Democratic Party has been not only since Donald Trump pulled off his stunner in November but the moment it became clear that Trump, alone among the initial GOP Gang 0f 17, would emerge to face and beat Hillary The Anointed One Who Could Not Lose. The Moonbats haven’t been the same since. Lizzie invoked the Four Freedoms: Freedom of Ignorance, Freedom of Partisanship, Freedom of Cradle-to-Grave Care by Big Brother Government, and Freedom of Perpetual High Taxes in the Nanny State. In other words, Lizzie’s tribe, who would make the Chief Wild Eagle’s Fakowees look like WASPS from Bel Air, offered loyalty of the highest order, one reminiscent of Nuremberg circa 1933.

The Boring Broadsheet’s gaga page-one story of Dizzy Miss Lizzie’s appearance, more like an apparition, quoted Ward 1 candidate Helen Haerhan Moon among the bedazzled.

“As a young woman getting involved in Massachusetts politics,” the Moonbat gushed, hearing Elizabeth Warren is inspiring.” Moonshot thus showed the proud results of hours of brainwashing by The Suits. You don’t mention “young woman” “getting involved” “in Massachusetts politics” without safely assuming her positions on education (more money for the Pittsfield School Department), taxes (need to be raised), municipal spending (too low), public safety (problems? What problems?), and a host of other issues already well covered by the lame liberal excuses for politicians for whom these parts have come to be known — and relied upon for Loyalty by the Bosses on Beacon Hill.

When Dizzy Lizzie left, the Loyal Tribe moved off led by a groveling Mayor Linda Tyer, all sucking up hard as they could to read the fading smoke signals. For the poor city of Pittsfield, it adds up to a long, hot summer leading to a meaningless election in November.

HERE, KITTY KITTY — Speaking of The BB, nice to see the local rag’s breathless reportage of the Pittsfield Police Department’s cracking of the major case that’s been buzzing the town since the Fourth of July. We speak not of the stabbings on Tyler Street or the gunplay and murder on John but of The Case of The Stolen Kitten.

As murders going back to Cain and Abel remain unsolved in Pittsfield, y’all can sleep safer tonight knowing that Acting Chief Michael Wynn put all available hands on deck to solve the kitty kaper. They brought in the Command Center, the goon squad in riot gear, and several parking attendants to apprehend … to apprehend … two underage girls. No official word on why the clueless teens broke into the Sonsini Shelter, but police sources tell THE PLANET they thought the kitty possessed Felix The Cat‘s Magic Bag. It seems that Felix’s estate bequeathed the Magic Bag to the kitten. The Bag, incidentally, now rests uncomfortably in the evidence room at police HQ, which means it’s about as safe as  the proverbial long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. You realize what this means for the PPD? The Professor and Rock Bottom have them in their sights.

O woe! What are we to do? Perhaps a call to Poindexter might be in order.

—————————————————————————————————

Whenever he gets in a fix, he reaches into his bag of tricks.” — Felix the Cat theme song.

“OPEN THE WINDOW, AUNT MILLIE.”

LOVE TO ALL.

The Usual Disclaimer.

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Mad Trapper
Mad Trapper
7 years ago

Faux Indian Princess, Lieawatha Lizzie took an axe (tomahawk?), gave Americans 40 wacks.

When she saw what she had done, she gave our President another one.

Ron Kitterman
Ron Kitterman
7 years ago

I have a signed copy of her Pow Wow Chow Cookbook that I’m considering auctioning off to highest bidder. Of course, I would only keep a portion of the proceeds.

Ed Shepardson
Ed Shepardson
7 years ago

“Dizzy, Miss Lizzy” is a rock and roll song composed and recorded by Larry Williams in 1958

h
h
Reply to  danvalenti
7 years ago

Larry Williams, must’ve been alone hit wonder.

Ed Shepardson
Ed Shepardson
Reply to  h
7 years ago

Williams’ three biggest successes were “Short Fat Fannie”, which was his biggest seller, reaching #5 in Billboard’s pop chart, “Bony Moronie”, which peaked at #14, and its flip “You Bug Me Baby” which made it to #45. “Dizzy, Miss Lizzy” charted at #69 on Billboard the following year. Both “Short Fat Fannie” and “Bony Moronie” sold over one million copies, gaining gold discs.[5]

Several of his songs achieved later success as revivals, by The Beatles (“Bad Boy”, “Slow Down”, and “Dizzy, Miss Lizzy”), The Rolling Stones (“She Said Yeah”) and John Lennon (“Bony Moronie” and “Dizzy, Miss Lizzy”).

Milt Plum
Milt Plum
Reply to  Ed Shepardson
7 years ago

Warren has rocks in her head.

Dilly Dally
Dilly Dally
7 years ago

Thin Lizzy,,,,,not.

Pat
Pat
7 years ago

Berkshire County is in serious need of a complete change of government. Instead we have a younger generation being recruited to continue the same political policies that have created the mess we have today. A new mayor will not make a difference or new faces on the council if they continue to espouse the same failed political philosophy promoted by Lizzie Warren.

Spectator
Spectator
7 years ago

How is the ” brainwashing by The Suits,” any different than what happens in Christian Nationalist America, who preaches deeply rooted racism, and that education past high school has little value?

Still wondering
Still wondering
Reply to  Spectator
7 years ago

And the crazies have arrived…

Spectator
Spectator
Reply to  Still wondering
7 years ago

This is just one person’s opinion, but it certainly makes you think harder about who the people on the right are, and what their value are – http://www.alternet.org/election-2016/rural-america-understanding-isnt-problem

Pat
Pat
Reply to  Spectator
7 years ago

I don’t know any Christian who believes they are superior because they are white. Just the opposite, a true Christian embraces everyone regardless of race. The article could have been written by a person who had a bad experience with the church and now blames the entire religion.

Personally I don’t always attend church regularly, but I do consider myself to be religious. I believe that it’s what is in your heart that counts and having faith in a higher power that matters.

The school committee
The school committee
Reply to  Pat
7 years ago

Pat,White privilege is about the culture you are raised in and the history you can repeat if you don’t understand that history.

Mad Trapper
Mad Trapper
Reply to  Spectator
7 years ago

We who rejected the left winged nuts are all just proud to be “deplorable”. Deplorable PRIDE

BTW- how did that special election go for the D-s who spent all that $$$ on a carpetbagger in Georgia go?

I’m laughing my (A)Ossoff!!!

Pat
Pat
Reply to  Mad Trapper
7 years ago

Progressives insist on making everything about race because except for taxing everybody to death they have NOTHING to offer.

Pat
Pat
Reply to  Spectator
7 years ago

No Christian church I know of preaches such a message. I think that politics has been turned into “the new religion” by many people. They see it as their salvation. They worship it and will let nobody speak against it. Not good when we know that politics is made up of flawed human beings who have to be kept in check constantly since there is so much money and power involved in politics. Treating your political party like a religion is a recipe for disaster for the country, but I think that is what has happened as religion became less popular, people turned to politics to find meaning in their lives.

Spectator
Spectator
Reply to  danvalenti
7 years ago

Aren’t those the people who by and large elected the current President?

Still wondering
Still wondering
Reply to  Spectator
7 years ago

A telling statement… those people. Trump was elected by millions of people who refused to vote for HRC. Simple as that.

Pat
Pat
Reply to  Still wondering
7 years ago

True. Trump did have Christian voters, but not all Christians are extremists. That must be some strange Christian sect I have never heard about mentioned by Spectator above.

The majority of Trump voters didn’t agree with Hillary’s policies of wanting to pour refugees from dangerous parts of the world into our country. Refugees who cannot be properly vetted. We don’t want to become France and England. Those are the people who voted for Trump.

Mad Trapper
Mad Trapper
Reply to  Spectator
7 years ago

That would be:

WE THE PEOPLE

Of the United States of America.

The left has become found of bashing God and in particular Christians.These are the “tolerant ” kooks; tolerant until you disagree with their, left of Chairman Mao agendas and ultimate goals.

What particularly irks them is the phrase “ONE NATION UNDER GOD, WITH LIBERTY AND JUSTICE FOR ALL”

Bill Q
Bill Q
7 years ago

Big crash on outer South st. Today, driver left the seen. Matter of time over on Hancock rd, went down there Saturday and cars were flying.

Pat
Pat
Reply to  Bill Q
7 years ago

Will this accident be reported in the local news? All of the others this past week haven’t been mentioned.

h
h
Reply to  Pat
7 years ago

Wait a couple weeks or if it is someone of importance, if you know what is mean?

CosbiesLadies
CosbiesLadies
Reply to  Pat
7 years ago

The rag is reportingon serious stuff Pat…like….Breakfast with Kate McGuire.

Pat
Pat
Reply to  CosbiesLadies
7 years ago

Yes, so interesting that she likes oatmeal with blueberries, but we really have more pressing issues that need to be reported.

Dilly Daly
Dilly Daly
Reply to  Pat
7 years ago

I had Captain Crunch today.

CosbiesLadies
CosbiesLadies
Reply to  CosbiesLadies
7 years ago

Well I certainly would pass on the ice tea.

mi
mi
7 years ago

Agree B Q …speed and the narrowness of the road on Hancock

Henry LaMere'
Henry LaMere'
7 years ago

Helen Moon is clueless

Milt Plum
Milt Plum
7 years ago

The mayor thinks this is cool….https://thepittsfielder.org/

Two Cents
Two Cents
Reply to  Milt Plum
7 years ago

Don’t see any issue. A valid point of view and worthwhile effort.

Tricksie
Tricksie
7 years ago

I was at this event and the fawning over this woman was nauseating. When all you do is tax and spend, and spend and tax it’s easy to get followers while the rest suffer – enough. Trump is making me a believer in a nationalist government, and he is one firey speech of whipping his true supporters (the disgusting middle class white guy) into a frenzy – it’s coming people and isn’t going to be pleasant….

Pat
Pat
Reply to  Tricksie
7 years ago

The working middle class must take back the country!!!!

Trumped Up
Trumped Up
Reply to  Pat
7 years ago

Well they just got Trump back door tax breaks for the wealthy axed.

Pat
Pat
Reply to  Trumped Up
7 years ago

The progressives only know how to tax to death the working middle class.

Luce Ball
Luce Ball
7 years ago

The press is out to get the info on D T Junior and Prez D T Sr. To prove that he knew about any meetings, that is the smoking gun, it’s alway’s the coverup. Gotta believe Jr. Told him,had to.

Pat
Pat
Reply to  Luce Ball
7 years ago

The media really wants to bring Trump down. The contrast between this and how they drooled all over Obama is unbelievable even when Obama was making deals with Putin after the election which he thought he had said off camera. Not a whimper from the press over that gem.

Pat
Pat
7 years ago

http://www.weeklystandard.com/obama-to-russia-after-my-election-i-have-more-flexibility/article/634473

Obama on hot mic making plans for deal with Russia after the election when he will have more flexibility. What could he have been planning? Only good things according to the media and liberals, but they would say that.

Shelly Liver
Shelly Liver
7 years ago

Hey Dan ice to see you back!

Shelly Liver
Shelly Liver
7 years ago

Nice to!

Jonathan Melle
Jonathan Melle
7 years ago

Elizabeth Warren is running for re-election next year (2018). She may be nominated to run for Prez against Trump in 2020.

Economic Injun
Economic Injun
Reply to  Jonathan Melle
7 years ago

Tell her to stop dancing. I’m sick of all this rain.

Pat
Pat
Reply to  Jonathan Melle
7 years ago

There is no way Warren will win the presidency. She is so far left just like Hillary and the majority of the country except for California and the Northeast will not accept an Elizabeth Warren presidency. We should be thankful for the common sense of the rest of the country.

Harlan RinkleNutts
Harlan RinkleNutts
7 years ago

Currently Las Vegas has Trump at 200-1 Lizzy is currently at 500- 1 guess who’s favored?

H
H
7 years ago

Caroline Kennedy.

Mad Trapper
Mad Trapper
Reply to  H
7 years ago

A Charlie Manson/Lucifer ticket would be preferable to anything Warrem/?????

Economic Injun
Economic Injun
Reply to  H
7 years ago