BY DAN VALENTI

PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY

(FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, MONDAY JULY 15, 2019) — Open season during a campaign year falls between early April and late July, when nomination papers can be had for the asking. The meaning of this civic ink-blot test clarifies when papers have to be filed on deadline, determining who wins a spot on the ballot.

The dabblers are the first to show their pattern. They’re the ones who, for whatever reason, take out papers just to take out papers. Usually it’s the unsettling desire to “get their name” in print. Such people have no intention of actually running or contributing to public life. They simply want a way to temporarily ease their insecurities about themselves. They are perpetual wannabees.

Next come the dillitantes. They’re the ones who turn in enough certified signatures to get their name on the ballot but will not run a campaign. There are two potential dillys running for mayor this year, Karen Kalinwsky and Scott Graves. Neither has yet shown the earnestness and resolution required for voters to take them seriously. THE PLANET refers to organization, money, and effort.

• Organization — We have yet to see any indication of a campaign from either Kalinowsky or Graves. An organization includes a visible and accessible campaign headquarters, staffed, along with workers and representatives in each of the city’s seven wards and respective precincts.
• Money — To compete in a mayoral contest, one needs, at minimum, $5,000. Actually, that amount would just get you to the next level. More like $20,000 and up would be a sufficient figure. This would pay for signage, literature, HQ, ads, and the like. There are only two ways to get this. You either supply it yourself, or you raise it. The first puts the money where the mouth is and extracts a personal price, literally. The second means setting up and enduring the indignities of endless coffee hours, solicitation phone calls, fund raisers, and other assorted side shows. You also end up owing your contributors. Will K & G show the dough?
• Effort — A actual candidate accepts all invitations, knocks on countless doors, speaks to anyone, addresses any group, no matter how insignificant. They will be relentless in being seen and heard. They will think of everything and leave out nothing to get their message across. Will the celebrated K and G hoof it to the extent of giving up their “normal” lives for a couple of months? They’re unknown. They’re going against an incumbent mayor with major backing and a popular councilor at-large whose supporters have been waiting for their big chance. Unless Kalinowsky and Graves outwork everyone else, they might as well forget it.

So far, all we’ve seen from Kaliowsky is a long letter to The Boring Broadsheet. She told The BB that she has 15 siblings, thus revealing her secret plan to win. She’s going to get all her relatives to vote for her. Graves has a FB campaign site with nothing on it. There are no photos, no policy statements, nothing. He’s a contractor, which means he won’t be getting any city business anytime soon.

We hope this changes, with K & G investing in the three essential ingredients necessary to compete. Otherwise, the two dillys are giving us yet another round of the Ted Mack Amateur Hour. If we’ve seen all they intend giving the electorate, Linda Tyer and Melissa Mazzeo can keep their powder dry until after the preliminary election in September. They’re the real deal.

That’s when the true campaign will begin.

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“The really frightening thing about middle age is the knowledge that you’ll grow out of it. Middle age is youth without levity, and age without decay” — Doris Day.

“OPEN THE WINDOW, AUNT MILLIE.”

LOVE TO ALL.

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