BY DAN VALENTI

PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY

(FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEDNESDAY AUG. 31, 2016) — Let’s start with three political notes.

(1) Christine Canning, Republican nominee in the state senate race, opened her campaign headquarters Monday night on North Street. If anyone doubted Canning’s seriousness, the highly visible HQ serves as evidence to the contrary. She’s in it to win.

(2) Signs of the Time — The six illegal signs on public property on Wahconah Street in front of the stadium — three for Tricia Farley-Bouvier and three for Adam Hinds, Dem Machine candidates for state house and senate, respectively — were taken down Monday. The public first learned of the signs on THE PLANET. By Monday night — poof! — gone. Someone got religion. Candidates must learn and respect the law with regard to signs everything else about campaigning.

(3) Revolving guest-co-hosts on PLANET VALENTI TELEVISION tomorrow include Supercitizen Terry Kinnas, Dem state senate candidate Andrea Harrington, and city council president Pete Marchetti.

And Now for Something ‘Different’

One of THE PLANET’s favorite pieces of classical music has long been Mussorgsky’s Pictures at an Exhibition, orchestration by Ravel. In honor of that timeless piece, let us share a few pictures.

These first three provide followup to our column (“The Amateur Hour,” July 28) about the painting of downtown electrical boxes. The “art” produced a series of embarrassing works that have at best been ignored and at worst mocked. Jury is in on the “art”: Guilty as charged. It did n-o-t-h-i-n-g to brighten or help North Street, during which time at least three more businesses closed or moved.

Picture 1

Alex Reczkowski with hands up in the air during a stick up. Woman at right hold gun shaped like “free” taxpayer-provided salad. Her dress was later used as a circus tent. (PHOTO: iBERKSHIRES)

This is Alex Reczkowski, director of the Berkshire Athenaeum who tries to hog more face time than TFB, announcing the “winners” of the paint-by-numbers contest.

As you can see, A-Rec did so from the offices of that Extremely Vital Taxpayer-Funded Waste of Money, Downtown Pittsfield Inc. (DPI). Here, A-Rec does his killer impression of Johnny Ray in drag singing Abide With Me.

The specs were stolen from an unemployed Ben Franklin impersonator.

E-box at North and Depot prior to desecration.

Picture 2

This is what the box at North and Depot looked like before desecration. The sea-foam green had, for years, been known to calm colic, ease anxiety, and otherwise go unnoticed by motorists — which was the whole idea in the first place.

Photo 3. E-box at North and Maplewood. “He Hate Me.”

Picture 3

You can find this gorgeous box at North and Maplewood. This beauty — by one of the street “artists” who scum-up the downtown with their worthless presence — perfectly captures the zeitgeist of downtown Pittsfield. The marvelously rendered three-line script roughly translates as “He Hate Me.” The slogan has so moved city officials and the apologists for “misguided” youth that “He Hate Me” shall replace Benigno Numine as Pittsfield’s new motto.

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Finally, we move to the rooftop. As readers may recall, THE PLANET brought your attention to the illegal posting on the city of Pittsfield’s official website of a political fundraiser for Adam Hinds, fair-haired boy  of the local Dem Machine (except he’s bald). The promotion touted Hinds on the Roof Friday night Aug. 19, a $5-per event. Put it together. Booze + Rooftops. THE PLANET’s secret photographer was there:

PHOTO 6, Hinds on the Roof: “So far, so good.”

Photo 5: Hinds on the Roof: Canonball.

Photo 4: Hinds on the Roof: “Look out below!”

Since that time, Hinds has ducked three invitations to sit down with THE PLANET, either live in front of a TV camera or informally over a cuppa Joe. He ducked an appearance on PLANET VALENTI TELEVISION Aug. 25 and for tomorrow night. The third invitation went ignored by The Committee to Elect Adam Hinds. Actually, we don’t know if Hinds has personally seen any of them. His staff seems to try to isolate him from harsh reality as much as possible.

Maybe “The Committee” is sore at us for catching them in multiple illegalities thus far (two and counting). Maybe they can’t handle criticism. God save the queen if he takes every little brush back pitch personally. So Adam, if you’re reading, get in touch, person-to-person. You don’t need a Committee to contact a PLANET.

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“She was common, flirty. She looked about 30. She said she liked the way I held the microphone.” — The Rolling Stones, “Spider to the Fly”

“OPEN THE WINDOW, AUNT MILLIE.”

LOVE TO ALL.

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