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NUCLEA SHMOOKLEA, ONE ARMED ROBBERY DESERVES ANOTHER, THE LOVELY LINDA COMES OUT STRONG, & EXPOSO THE BOZO … plus … THE COMMENT LINE IS OPEN

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BY DAN VALENTI

PLANET VALENTI NEWS AND COMMENTARY

(FORTRESS OF SOLITUDE, WEEKEND EDITION, JAN. 15-17, 2016) — As we hit another weekend, THE PLANET, like the Buddah, sheds all worldly attachments. The Buddah did it by contemplation under George Washington’s cherry tree. We do it by (1) taping a guest spot on SCTV’s “For The Record” show this morning with co-hosts Kameron Spaulding and Terry Cowgill of the Berkshire Record and Courier, and (2) disposing of several topical items and itches. Thus …

Nuclea Nukes PittsfieldTHE PLANET warned you about these stiffs the moment we got our first

DEVAL and DEVOUR, aka, Pat Muraca, who from this photo looks as if he devoured everything in sight.

whiff, when Mayor Lockdown fell in love with the empty promises (see THE PLANET, Feb. 26, 2015, “$510,000 TAX BREAK TO NUCLEA BIOTECH RAISES QUESTIONS”).

When Pat “The Elephant Man” Muraca said the word “biotechnology,” Dan Bianchi wet his pants; Muraca moistened his test tubes. PLANET spies tell us that “between 20 and 30 jobs” will be lost.

You’ll recall Muraca bailed out a few months ago to Albany.

Would you buy a used fried chicken dinner from this man?

When Muraca’s hegira to NanoNoNo there was announced six weeks ago, Coreydon Thurston, PEDA’s top cardboard cutout, said the reorganization plan would not affect the Nuclea Playstation and Game Room on Kellogg Street. Right.

Sources tell us the company’s free ride on Kellogg will soon become “tariffed.”  The entire Nuclea fiasco proves once again that one litter box isn’t enough for 20 dysenteried cats.

One Armed Robbery Every 5 Days — That’s the frequency, Kenneth, of these PUCW’s (“Poo-choos”) — Pittsfield Unauthorized Cash Withdrawals, aka, armed robberies. Add the number of home and car break-ins, you’re talking multiple PWCHs each day. It’s to the point where city storeowners and merchants — the ones that haven’t yet left — are questioning whether to stay or pull out. For example, Mark Charland of Charland Jewelers in Allendale openly surveyed his Facebook friends asking if they would object to passing security before being allowed to enter the store. Charland said he’s afraid for his employees and his business. Which leads to …

The Mayor’s Response — Yesterday, Linda Tyer came out forcefully in the press, calling the mayhem “unacceptable.” She said officers would be pulled from non-essential duties to work on solving the nine (of 10) unsolved robberies. Tyer also got off strongly in her first visit in council chambers as mayor. She pushed for jobbing out legal services, and the council agreed, 8-3. Donovan and O’Connor will be retained for $8,500 a month on a six-month trial basis. This compares with the salaries and benefits of an incompetent full-time solicitor and a skillful part-time assistant totaling about $150,000 a year. Tyer’s blazing start also included “yes” to THE PLANET’s invitation to grace the set of PLANET VALENTI TELEVISION. Last night we kept it conversational not confrontational, but the fact that the mayor is smart enough to realize that re-election goes through THE PLANET bodes well. Through this website and TV show, we offer saturation local exposure, double entendre and all, hitting nearly 100% of those who pay attention to what’s happening politically — and many who don’t.

Is That All There Is? — Speaking of exposure, the recent vignette at a Tyler Street laundromat is “soooo Pittsfield.” Police say Amana Whirlpool Maytag, 20 (not his real name), smashed a dryer window, reached in, pulled out clothes that weren’t his, then exposed himself. Cops say Maytag left the joint wearing the stolen clothes. This budding Pittsfield genius reminds THE PLANET of a mid-70s quote from Red Sox left fielder Carl Yastrzemski after a streaker pranced across the Fenway pitch. Asked about it after the game, Yaz quipped, “He showed me nothing.” We wonder, though, if young Maytag has invented a novel way of campaigning for a council seat?

With that, THE PLANET opens The Comment Line and wishes you all a happy weekend.

—————————————————————————

“I keep a friend serene. Here it comes. Hey baby come on to me. Here it comes. Yes it’s coming along. Come out of the closet baby. You’ll catch your death in the fog. Young girls, they call them the diamond dogs.”David Bowie, from “Diamond Dogs” and the album of the same name, (1974).

“OPEN THE WINDOW, AUNT MILLIE.”

LOVE TO ALL.

The views expressed in the comment section or opinions published within the text other than those of PLANET VALENTI are not those of PLANET VALENTI or endorsed in any way by PLANET VALENTI; this website reserves the right to remove any comment which violates its Rules of Conduct, and it is not liable for the consequences of any posted comment as provided in Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act and PLANET VALENTI’s terms of service.

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Change
Change
7 years ago

I slipped and fell walking at one of the schools this morning ,why are they so lazy they won’t even snowblow,they never put sand down…
I’m told stracuzz makes 54 bucks per hrs doing snow removal on top of 56000 bucks cutting lawns in the nice weather…hangout at dunking donuts when working

Roberto Del Halitoso
Roberto Del Halitoso
Reply to  Change
7 years ago

Perhaps you might take a photograph? Hmmmmmmm?

Dilly Dally
Dilly Dally
7 years ago

I don’t necessarily agree that we have to have a City Solicitor Quote from the Mayor …..C C Meeting Jan. 12

Dilly Dally
Dilly Dally
7 years ago

King was a Saint!

mi
mi
7 years ago

The new way to go in Pitts is to hire quality employees by increasing the salary and being less productive. What don’t Councilors understand? WE should have a full time City Solicitor that is in the office for 40 hrs., instead of chasing someone down through a secretary. It’s amazing how the factions are realigned and are debating for the current Mayor’s option on this subject. Could Mazzeo have given a Charter objection, she had some good points. I laughed at Dahoney,with his wanting to save the City money.

amandaWell
amandaWell
7 years ago

Council Grades: Rivers C
White C
Morandi A
Amuso B
Marchetti B
mazzeo A
Connell C
Simonelli B
Tully B
caccamo

Jack Wagon
Jack Wagon
Reply to  amandaWell
7 years ago

Order coloring books and crayons for Tully, Krol, Cocomo and Amuso. They can’t comprehend what’s going on. At least they could look busy.

painter
painter
7 years ago

No more tax breaks until the company proves that they can keep employees for more than 5 years then maybe a tax break. Giving a break first is not working.

amandaWell
amandaWell
7 years ago

Cr@ig Supporters, with all due respect, the Planet has given all us a great chance to say what’s on our minds for several years now. The least we can do is give him the same respect, don’t bite the hand that has given you the opportunity. I actually like Mr. Blogging, but think you could do it without I sulking the host.

Bill Q
Bill Q
7 years ago

Someone should tell one of those Politicians, sun and booze don’t work.

Bub Fan
Bub Fan
7 years ago

can’t we all just get along.

Change
Change
7 years ago

Would someone interpret what arLos is talking about

Change
Change
7 years ago

Cacao gets an f grade…says he’s into the environment but says Noth about Allendale school 350 children learning at a toxic dump…he want taconic built

Bub Fan
Bub Fan
7 years ago

The readactor must be a twenty four seven deal.